Hello Stylinistas;
The first day of a good rain! Hallelujah!! Even though the rain was really heavy, I didn't even mind all the errands I had to run.
The first appointment was a dental appointment for my semi-annual cleaning. My hygenist, a woman of 62 was bemoaning the fact she had trouble with cosmetics because of the hot flashes; I, of course, asked her how she remedied the situation because her make-up appeared flawless. She provided these helpful hints; always use a powder base and water proof mascara; she also suggested using dark brown eye-liner rather than black because the smudging appeared more a 'smokey eye' effect and was softer if perspiration smudged her liner. I thanked her for her tips (fortunately, I never suffered from hot flashes; lucky me from all I hear).
I also want to address the subject of compliments today; I get my personal styling feedback from only two sources; The first is my mirror. I look very critically in full length three way mirrors anytime I get dressed. I believe what I see. Of course, you must be objective. I read a book a few years ago called "Does this Make Me Look Fat?' by noted stylist Leah Feldon. The gist of the title was that if you had to ask the question, you already knew the answer; I also believe that you can NEVER rely upon an unbiased answer if you ask the question "how do I look". The following story will illustrate what I mean:
I supervised a young woman who had dressed carefully for an important meeting. She was nervous, a little insecure, and expressed anxiety about her dress to several persons in a group setting. She asked me in the group setting what I thought about what she was wearing. Naturally, I told her she looked "fine", everything would be great, just "be herself", and give it her best. I had a friend who overheard the conversation and who was knew my background and interest in "interview costuming". She also knew me well enough to know that I had been forced into a corner when giving her my "fine" answer.
The point is, my friend knew I would never tell an anxious person who needed all the confidence she could get anything that could upset her at that time and place. She could do nothing about it but worry. That would be cruel and unproductive, at best.
Over the years I have known many women who remark on compliments from friends or acquaintances, seeking confirmation of their supposed feedback. I have known many who ask for feedback, but are confident in their own style choices and no matter their expression of wanting feedback would NOT take kindly to ANY form of "constructive' criticism. There are too many variables in compliments from people you know or from those who may not wish to answer negatively. (case in point: Melanie Griffith in the movie, "Working Girl", when she asked her boss how she looked. Her new boss told her she "looked great" but she may need to "rethink her jewelry", Melanie was smart enough to immediately begin dressing very differently and used her boss as a reference point for her style of dress. (I'm sure Melanie got lots of compliments on her old style from her girlfriends and the crowd she hung with in her old environment)).
I addressed this subject today because if you wear a specific style, color, collar, haircut, hair color, etc. and you receive multiple compliments from varied people throughout the day, especially strangers, it would be wise to take note of the style detail(s) and incorporate it into your personal style kit. You will seldom be wrong.
I supervised a young woman who had dressed carefully for an important meeting. She was nervous, a little insecure, and expressed anxiety about her dress to several persons in a group setting. She asked me in the group setting what I thought about what she was wearing. Naturally, I told her she looked "fine", everything would be great, just "be herself", and give it her best. I had a friend who overheard the conversation and who was knew my background and interest in "interview costuming". She also knew me well enough to know that I had been forced into a corner when giving her my "fine" answer.
The point is, my friend knew I would never tell an anxious person who needed all the confidence she could get anything that could upset her at that time and place. She could do nothing about it but worry. That would be cruel and unproductive, at best.
Over the years I have known many women who remark on compliments from friends or acquaintances, seeking confirmation of their supposed feedback. I have known many who ask for feedback, but are confident in their own style choices and no matter their expression of wanting feedback would NOT take kindly to ANY form of "constructive' criticism. There are too many variables in compliments from people you know or from those who may not wish to answer negatively. (case in point: Melanie Griffith in the movie, "Working Girl", when she asked her boss how she looked. Her new boss told her she "looked great" but she may need to "rethink her jewelry", Melanie was smart enough to immediately begin dressing very differently and used her boss as a reference point for her style of dress. (I'm sure Melanie got lots of compliments on her old style from her girlfriends and the crowd she hung with in her old environment)).
I addressed this subject today because if you wear a specific style, color, collar, haircut, hair color, etc. and you receive multiple compliments from varied people throughout the day, especially strangers, it would be wise to take note of the style detail(s) and incorporate it into your personal style kit. You will seldom be wrong.
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